Post with 4 notes
Before you read I need to say that english is not my native language, so this text will probably have lots of faults + there’s always room for improvement. If you have any comments on the grammar or spelling - please message me so that I can fix it. I also apologize for my extreme use of parentheses (I just love them all right?)
I said I would so now I will write more about the street harassment that me and my partner was subjected to the other day - or more precisely: I want to talk about “the male gaze”
Because that’s what it was about - the fact that a man can get so upset over two girls caring more about each other than him - it was about the male gaze being rejected, unappreciated, overthrown. And that (and this is only what I believe, I do not speak for my partner or any other victim of street harassment, this is mainly my idea of the situation I experienced) caused the “need” within this man to degrade us, make us unworthy of his attention or approval in the only way he knew how (since lesbian didn’t work as an insult): by insinuating that we were sex workers.
And it’s the same male gaze that makes the mainstream porn so bad and the female comic book heroines so unrealistic (if you need proof, check out the hawkeye initiative..).
It is because every fucking mainstream media ever is presented for, or in relation to, a male audience.
And no, I don’t say that movies and shows and games especially directed to women are made for a male audience - but notice that these different kinds of girl-fixated mainstream medias has the need to define that they are for girls. When we have a movie from a male viewpoint (which is most big movies actually - I mean just do The Bechdel Test for fucks sake), nobody feels the need to write about it as a “guy-movie”.
Also most movies/shows/games directed to women suffers from the delusion that the only interest women have is the heterosexual monogamous relationship and how to get there = catching and keeping the male approval.
And as we are taught we act. For an example I’ve spent years and years hating my body because I never got a guys approval of it, and then some years having sex just to get that approval.
And it hurt me so much.
So my question is:
Why does everybody act so surprised when a guy acts like a douchebag towards anyone who isn’t a cis male - he has basically been told his whole life that the life of anyone who isn’t a cis male is totally dependent on his approval and opinion.
I’m actually more surprised that not every guy I meet is a totally egocentric douchebag - given how much media we consume in the society I live in.
We have to talk more about the idea of the male gaze and what it does to our brains, we have to question it and discuss it. This text is just a small part, but please fill in, continue the discussion.
(and remember - although this mostly applies to cismales it is not exclusively cismales who have the privilege of the male gaze).
ps: there is another classical gaze-privilege that we must never forget and that is of course the white gaze. the reason that I do not discuss it in this text is that I don’t feel educated enough to make statements about how it feels to live under it since my life is stuffed with white-privilege.
s I said before I do not master this language so this post is shorter and more unfulfilled than it would have been had I been writing in swedish, so please continue!
Post with 3 notes
So yesterday a man on the subway station found it suitable to grab me and ask me and my partner if we wanted to follow him home cause “don’t you need the money?” - All because we were kissing in public and had earlier told him that we were in a relationship when he (quite upset) asked “wait what are you doing, you are two girls, you shouldn’t be doing that!”
Yay of course lesbian couples only exist to satisfy your erotic fantasies and women who show no interest in you must be put in place by being sexually “degraded”.. Way to go.
Post with 1 note
FUCK THE SYSTEM
in bright big letters, my insides makes a small revolution an inch from the first F, breathtakingly close from your hand, holding the water-resistant pen that makes a scratchy noise as it colours the wall. Fuck this system yes do it, fuck it so I don’t remember it, fuck my inside system, my logic, use fingers, tongue and bone oh yes; Fuck the system.